Truth is a very important character trait for a practicing Buddhist to reflect. It should be, I think, an important character trait for anyone not only to reflect, but to embrace, whether a Buddhist or not. But in Buddhism it is so important that it is one of the Five Precepts taken by all who have chosen enlightenment as a goal and have chosen to follow the teachings of the Buddha.
The way the precept on truthfulness usually is stated in the Five Precepts is that one will train to refrain from lying. The pledge also can be expressed this way: “I vow to abstain from speaking falsehood and I vow to encourage truthfulness.” So Buddhism’s precepts not only call for refraining, but for indulging; not just to stop doing something unskillful or which causes dukkha (suffering, frustration, unhappiness), but to start doing something skillful which causes sukha (peace of mind, happiness).
It’s the same with the other four precepts: vowing to train to refrain from killing, stealing, improper sex and intoxicants, and vowing to train to encourage life, practice giving, respect for others and avoiding ingesting what is harmful.
In the case of practicing truthfulness and avoiding lying, a practicing Buddhist should also avoid gossiping and talking “behind another person’s back”. A good Buddhist story to accentuate how one might learn to help cure a gossip and how a gossip might learn to refrain from such practice is this one:
At a Buddhist church in a small town in Northern California, Lucy, the church’s gossip, was always sticking her nose into other people’s business; she had appointed herself the church’s monitor of morals. Congregation members didn’t approve of her gossiping, but usually didn’t say anything and avoided confrontation. But when she accused Charlie, a new church member, of being an alcoholic, things changed. Lucy said she saw Charlie’s old pickup truck parked in front of the local bar one afternoon and that everyone knows what that means he was doing. When Charlie got wind of her accusation, he didn’t say a word. He didn’t explain, defend himself, or deny the charge. Instead, later that evening, he quietly parked his pickup in front of Lucy’s house . . . walked home . . . and left it there all night.
While the story ends there, and I don’t encourage retribution, I do think it’s easy to imagine that that action probably put a cramp in Lucy’s gossiping habit. Hopefully, she learned that gossiping is equal to lying in the hurt and harm it can cause. It’s not enough just to refrain from lying and gossiping; it’s important to say nice things to people when it’s the truth. Why keep it to yourself; share your nice thoughts with others, so they can enjoy them, too. But keep your not-so-nice ones to yourself. That way everyone’s better off.
I have read and heard it said that the tongue is the most dangerous part of the body. I was often told as a wee lad that,” If I had nothing good to say, then say nothing.”